In the Lonely Hour…

Sixty minutes, three thousand  six hundred seconds and three million six hundred thousand milliseconds equal one hour.They say when having fun time flies by , things take a drastic turn when you aren’t huh?That one hour can seem like days.We may find this hard to admit but for many of us whenever we are lonely we tend to go back to things that mean us no good .Stuff that we left behind for a reason , suddenly become desirable.So for those few hours or days ,however long your lonely streak lasts for we find ourselves being comforted by people or things that were meant to be dished out a long time ago .Then when your life regains that flame you do either one of two things , you either forget about what you had been doing to consume your time or that old habit becomes an active part in your life again.Well whichever option you choose , your wrong.

Never go back to something you left for a reason , I know it may be hard at times but the mere fact that you let go of it meant that it wasn’t as valuable as you thought it was  .Hold up! many of us may argue and say If you love something let it go and if it comes back its yours forever yea I agree with that but the saying says you should let whatever it is come back to YOU you shouldn’t be the one seeking what you already left.Change is born from dissatisfaction.Growth is limitless , being alone and actually sitting with our thoughts can lead to realizations that are very rare in our everyday busy lives.

Embrace your lonely hour .Stop letting just anyone in for comfort ,allowing people  to be in our lives once more with hope that their intentions are pure .Don’t worry about why your not Facebook or Instagram famous , or why no one is reaching out to you.Just be you. DO NOT SETTLE.

Dont Rush Your Progress

For the past three weeks I have been going through writers block , it seemed like no matter what I did  I was not able to find any source of motivation to write.Yes, on many occasions there were lessons that I could have drawn from but throughout this period  nothing stayed , nothing captured my heart enough that I felt a need to blog about it and share with you guys . I remember sharing what was happening to me with my  close friend and her response was “it’s ok hun , dont rush the progress”.I took comfort to her words and went on doing my daily routine in hopes that my motivation would reappear.Then a week later,  like a gust of wind it hit me. DONT RUSH THE PROGRESS.

The skin from the snake cannot be ripped off , it will shed when it is ready .This same mentality should apply to us as humans and our individual progress.Often times we get frustrated about not being able to deliver or perform as we think we should ,for whatever reason our motivation disappears and we beat ourselves up because we aren’t performing as we think we should. I cannot speak on behalf of everyone when I say this but sometimes taking a step back is what we need in order to find yourself again. It is OK to take a break and look at yourself from the outside ,you’d be surprised how therapeutic self evaluation can be.

We live in a fast paced world ,a world where technology is trying to outsmart us. Do not get caught up in trying to make too many things happen at once.The moment you feel like you have to rush your way through is the moment you should stop and take a breather .It will come.It will happen and you will make it through.Have an attitude of a victor and not a victim.As I wrote in my Behind The Mask blog it is important to surround yourself with good people who can help you whenever you feel as if you’ve run of fuel. In life everything takes time .Growth happens everyday , we didn’t just wake up one day and turn into adults ,it took years of development, experience and our parents being patient with us.So with all that being said do not get discouraged when you bump into a road block but be patient enough to know that you ARE still progressing and anything that is growing should not be rushed.

Discovering our Blind Spots

One of the things that we forget more than ever about ourselves is that we are not PREFECT. Many will disagree and say “no of course I know I am not perfect ,I have flaws” ,so if that’s the case why do we fail to accept when someone points out our “flaws” other wise known as Blind Spots. A Blind Spot in this context refers to personal development ,features of ourselves that we are not fully aware of.This can cover a broad spectrum  of different things – our traits ,idiosyncrasies , values , habits , feelings etc. It is given this name for a reason , we simply cannot see them for ourselves however, people on the outside such as our close friends , family members and our significant other are most likely to see them and at some point will point them out to us.

Many times when we are addressed about our flaws we often make excuses for our behaviour , we might say we had an off day or we just weren’t in the mood and that’s why we acted that way. The mind wants comfort , and anytime we are confronted about something that does not fit into our comfort zone a red flag goes off and automatically we jump to reasons as to why it couldn’t be.You see, if we get complimented we are grateful and willing to accept . According to Norihio  Sadato , the study lead and professor at the National Institute for Physiological Sciences in Japan : “To the brain ‘ receiving  a compliment is as much a social reward as being rewarded money ” the study also went on to show that the same area of the  brain  was affected ,the Striatum, is activated when a person is rewarded a compliment or cash. Believe it or not it all has to do with our psychological build up  . Many persons believe that being  open  to correction makes them vulnerable or weak and so they are just  not willing to do that.

This is not the case , when you are oblivious to something there is a likelihood that you have never worked on it before , which leaves an opportunity for improvement and as individuals we should all be wiling to improve the way we are .You might not realize it , but your Blind Spots can be acting as an invisible boundary that limits your experience in life .When you uncover your blind spots and start working on them you start becoming more conscious as an individual , but first you need to know what they are so you can start working on them.

Uncovering our blind spots can lead to serious personal growth , when a person points out our flaws whether they say it in an angry tone or calmly address it , after the discussion is over you can do a self evaluation to find out if what was being said is true .It is important to ask about yourself , you will be surprised to hear what people think if you just take the time to listen and not assume that everything is fine .